I am a stress head. I find molehills and turn them into mountains. I pick, pick, pick at teeny tiny issues until they're suddenly 'The Most Pressing Issues Ever' and I'm tearing my hair out with worry. I am the queen of catastrophe! However, I also have moments of recognition, of realising that I'm actually blessed to be able to worry about such small things when there are far worse circumstances I could find myself in. My life is filled with good things.
I'm healthy, my family and friends are healthy, and I am loved. I do not want for food or shelter, I am fortunate to have an education and I have gifts and talents I am fortunate enough to be able to cultivate and share. I realised just how blessed my life has been so far when my soon to be father in law was rushed to hospital a month or so ago. My fiance and I caught the bus into central London at 12.30am that night, walking part of the way and saying silent prayers. When someone you love is sick, every other worry pales in comparison. Material concerns suddenly seem wickedly indulgent. Love and health become everything.
My father in law has made a full recovery, thankfully, and the relief felt when his good diagnosis was given was incredible. I do believe love is tangible; the energy in that small hospital room was strong, and although the result of difficult circumstances I'm sure we all gained a lot from spending so much time together that week. Before we knew what was wrong I spent some time meditating with my tarot cards, wondering if I should do a reading and if I was able to accept whatever might show if I did. I felt a huge responsibility all of a sudden; reading tarot is no joke! When I read for someone I'm taking their situation and holding it gently in my hands while being trusted with the task of aiding clarity and understanding. Tarot has the amazing ability to heal, and to read tarot for someone is always a healing experience in some way.
I did go ahead and conduct a reading and it was the right decision as everything suggested by the cards unfolded and reaffirmed to me that I'm on the right path. The cards taught me in that moment to trust in myself, to share love with my loved ones and to appreciate the incredible blessings I have in my life. I've felt quite low and despondent recently, yet when I think back to my father in law being in hospital all I wanted for was good health and love. How easy it is to forget that so quickly! I have three incredible gifts in my life right now: love, health and a recognition of my purpose. With health, love and purpose anyone can achieve wonderful, spectacular things. Incredible things!
I urge you to take a moment to stop, look around and count your blessings. It isn't always easy, by any means. Hello, I'm the queen of the catastrophe! Force yourself to do it. Be strict with yourself, discipline yourself, write a list if you have to. Commit pen to paper and commit to remembering your blessings. I promise your mood will begin to lift and your strength will grow. Great things will happen! Not least a deeply felt sense of gratitude for the good things in life, both big and small.
Baci e abbracci,
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